Chances are, you are curious if you know your significant other well enough. Knowing and understanding the person you love is an essential aspect of a relationship. If you do not know or understand the small things that make them smile, it can be tricky to make them happy.
Some say that love and happiness fade over time in relationships. That can be true, or the saying possibly originated when people lived during tough times. History has proven that everyone was bound to traditional and societal concepts of what a family and marriage should be in the past.
Times have changed, and people are learning more about each other every day. That is what growth and development are about. Today, people understand that love requires work and that many factors play in successful relationships.
So, if you want to make it work with your significant other, you should at least know the person well and even better than themselves. This isn’t about asking questions from a slam book; it’s about the significant things that can make or break your relationship.
1. Love languages
There are five known love languages: physical touch, acts of service, quality time, words of affirmation, and gift-giving. There are two ways love languages are applied to a relationship. It is how they love and how they want to be loved. Knowing your significant other’s love languages can help you love them better, and it can address misunderstandings if you know how to apply them.
For example, if your partner values quality time more, you must at least try to finish at work earlier so that you can spend time together instead of asking them to adjust. Or, if your significant other values sentimental gifts, you can opt for customized rings instead of generic-looking bands to show them how much they mean to you.
2. Coping mechanisms
Two things are sometimes inevitable in a relationship — miscommunication and misunderstanding. There might be days that you fight because you are tired and stressed. There might be instances that you can’t stand each other’s presence, and there might be days when one of you is passive-aggressive with how you react.
That is why knowing how your significant other reacts to problems like these can help your relationship. A lot of problems arise because of incompatible ways of coping and yes values. For example, one of you likes to remain quiet whenever there’s an argument. Or the other might tend to storm off to cool down. If this happens, you should allow them the time to do so. Don’t be upset about it and throw it back to their faces.
Furthermore, this aspect is vital in a relationship because not all coping mechanisms are healthy. Suppose you recognize your partner resorting to unhealthy habits of gaslighting and manipulation whenever you try to address concerns. If so, consider what you should do in this case. You might have to decide on ending the relationship.
3. Dreams and aspirations
In a lighter contrast, you should also be aware of your partner’s dreams and aspirations. A person’s character is about the things they are passionate about. Do they like to read? Are they fond of comedic skits? Are they into social activism? Do they talk about politics?
Knowing things like these can help you understand what drives your partner to wake up in the morning and exist. People’s dreams and aspirations should be more pronounced for you to understand them better.
4. Childhood
Did you know that a person’s character is deeply rooted in their childhood? What you see in them can be an effect of their upbringing. All tendencies, healthy or toxic, are results of how their childhood was. If your significant other seems fragile when you raise your voice, it might pertain to a traumatic event they witnessed or experienced in their past.
The way they react to a situation can be an indication of how they were as a child. Either way, knowing their childhood story can help you be what they need. Having a clear idea of their past can help shed more light on them.
A popular method of getting to know a partner nowadays is by checking their natal charts. All you need is their birth date, time of birth, and an astrology app to see if you guys are compatible. But whatever method you use to understand them, make sure you don’t force things out of them. Remember, you do this for both of you, giving each other the chance to get to know the other better.
Article Submitted By Community Writer
